As far as the ministry, I never really liked it. I am not a born in, but close enough to feel like one.
I regular pioneered 3 different times, all the while believing that the more I involved myself in the ministry, the more I would grow to love it. I even tried to convince others of that yet never really believed it. I realize now I was just parroting what I heard from the WTBTS because that never happened. My love for it never grew. I always felt like a bother.
I also, while I don't mind dressing up for other occasions, hated doing it for service. I hated, both as a kid and and as an adult, leaving my house and having my neighbors see me dressed up on a Saturday morning. It drew undue attention to me and I couldn't stand when I was asked why I was dressed up.
It was hard to stop going out in the ministry though because I feared what others in the hall would think. But thankfully, I grew a pair and haven't looked back in just about a year already.
Damn how I love my weekends! Why the hillbilly did I wait so long to take them back for myself?
CoC